Surviving a Brain Injury

Written by Sylvia Small Thursday, November 04 2010

Snapshot: Lee Woodruff
There are 65.7 million caregivers in the United States who are providing crucial, unpaid care for a loved one. According to the National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP, the average caregiver is a 49-year-old woman who works at a paid job. She spends 20 hours each week helping her loved one with household chores and transportation needs. Most people don't think of themselves as caregivers because they are usually providing those services for a family member.

Lee Woodruff joined those ranks in 2006 after her husband, Bob Woodruff, was injured in a roadside bomb blast while covering the war in Iraq for ABC-TV. The injury came just 26 days after Bob Woodruff had been named co-anchor of World News Tonight. He was at the apex of his career.

In 2007, the couple wrote In an Instant: A Family's Journey of Love and Healing, which chronicles Bob's road to recovery. The Woodruff family also established the Bob Woodruff Family Foundation for Traumatic Brain Injury. The foundation has raised $8.5 million to assist members of the military with cognitive rehabilitation and care following a traumatic brain injury suffered in service to their country.

As of January 2008, the RAND Center for Military Health Policy Research estimates approximately 300,000 service members suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder or major depression and 320,000 have experienced a probable traumatic brain injury during deployment.

Lee Woodruff is the author of Perfectly Imperfect: A Life in Progress, and she is the life and family contributor for ABC's Good Morning America.

Womenetics: What's one of the hardest parts about dealing with a brain injury?
Lee Woodruff: When Bob was stumbling or couldn't find the correct word, the best thing I could give him was his dignity. That is the surest way to make somebody feel safe. I knew Bob would do everything for me that I was doing for him because he's just that kind of guy.

Womenetics: How's your husband doing?
Woodruff: Bob has recovered remarkably well. He's no longer in an anchor chair because that job couldn't wait. But he covers stories for all the different ABC network platforms. You would probably just hear a few hiccups in his speech if he were talking to you.

Every doctor who saw him in those touch-and-go moments can't believe how well he's doing. A brain injury is completely individual. I think he was spared to put a face to what a brain injury really is.

Womenetics: To what things do you attribute his recovery?
Woodruff: It's a testament to many things. We couldn't have made it without our friends, family, and faith. I know there were a lot of people praying for us.

We have an incredible family. I have two sisters, and Bob has three brothers. Your girlfriends surround you! Our church even planted flowers in our yard. I couldn't have done it without my community of people.

Womenetics: What did you learn that will help others in a similar situation?
Woodruff: We're hesitant as caregivers to ask for help. We think we should be able to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps. Caring for a loved one is an isolating, exhausting experience. Hold something in reserve for yourself.

I tell people to be honest. Yes, this situation should never have happened to you. Get down on their level. There's no first or second prize for grieving. We all grieve in our own way.

Let the difficult moments pass through you. Although you're doing this out of love, it doesn't mean the process isn't taking something from you.

Don't ask what you can do to help. Find out what the person needs and do it. I loved people who pushed through that door. Be one of those people. When you're on the receiving end, just take it and be gracious.

This journey has taught me to enjoy being in the moment. I have no control over what's coming around the corner. Each person in my family is a survivor. We are no different than any other American family.

Sylvia Small is a seasoned public relations practitioner, freelance writer, and photographer. Her work has been published in Southern Homes (Atlanta Homes & Lifestyles), Photo District News, Grit and numerous trade publications.