Narrow Escape from Poverty and Abuse

Written by Jan Jaben-Eilon Wednesday, March 02 2011

Snapshot: Johnnetta McSwain
Johnnetta McSwain is the author of Rising Above the Scars and founder of the organization, Breaking the Cycle: Beating the Odds. Her book is the account of her triumphant life journey during which she battled extreme, traumatic child abuse, neglect, and self-destruction, along with her sister in Birmingham, Ala. She narrowly escaped poverty, abuse, imprisonment, and death. She has broken every generational cycle and is a symbol and voice of survival. Her story inspired the Emmy Award-winning documentary, The Road Beyond Abuse, narrated by Jane Fonda, on Georgia Public Broadcasting. She is the mother of two sons and lives in Atlanta, where she is pursuing her Ph.D.

On March 5, McSwain be honored during the 2011 Live Your Dream Award brunch of Soroptimist International of Atlanta. The event supports improving the lives of women and girls in local communities through recognition of their accomplishments and providing financial resources to help them live their dreams.

McSwain will receive the Ruby Award, which honors women who have worked to improve the lives of women and girls through their professional and/or volunteer work. The event will be held at the Sheraton, Perimeter North Hotel.

Womenetics: How did you learn about the state-funded General Education Diploma (GED) program, and what prompted you to enroll there when you were 19?
Johnnetta McSwain: I pretty much had heard about the GED all my life. My mother had studied and received her GED when I was little. So, I knew what a GED was all about. I was 19 with a baby and no high school diploma; I knew this wasn’t going to be sufficient later in life. I was catching the bus somewhere, and I saw a flyer displaying information on obtaining a GED by enrolling in a state-funded program. I called the number and went to apply. I enrolled and graduated. I sat for the GED test the first time and missed passing by one point. I made another appointment to retake the test a few weeks later and passed.

Womenetics: Why do you think you were able to break out of the cycle of poverty that others in your family were unable to?
McSwain: Well, looking back now, I realized that my two sons were my primary motivation to break my cycles of poverty, violence, abuse, and lack of education. Coming from a family of high school dropouts, heavy substance and drug abuse, I knew I didn’t want to continue the generational cycle. When I turned 30 years old, I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror, and I realized I was a product of my negative family cycles. Unless, I wanted my two sons to continue this cycle of destruction; I had to do something I had never done before. That was break these cycles.

Womenetics: What has happened with your sister?
McSwain: My sister has suffered from depression, anger, and hopelessness most of her adolescence and now her adult life. She has been battling crack cocaine for over 20 years and recently was diagnosed with mental illness. She is suicidal. She is working on forgiving and mending her relationship with my mother. She blames her for the sexual, physical, and emotional abuse we suffered as children. We have a very close relationship. I adore her. She is so proud of all my accomplishments, and she supports me. In fact, she was so happy to share her life journey in the documentary. In addition, her story in the book is in her words. She resides in Alabama. You will have to read the book.

Womenetics: What is the 12 Step Self-Awareness Model (SAM) you created, and how did you meet your mentor, Dr. Susan N. Kossak?
McSwain: The 12-Step Self-Awareness Model (SAM) is a blueprint of what it took for me to leave Alabama and start my life journey at age 32 in Georgia. The very first thing I had to do at age 30 was become self-aware that something was wrong with my life. That’s how I came up with the title. Each step describes in detail how to break the cycles that cripple us and prevent us from reaching our fullest potential in our lives.

Dr. Kossak encouraged me to write my life story in workshop form to present at the annual National Association of Social Workers Georgia conference. She edited the model and co-presented with me at the conference. Dr. Kossak is a slender, white, Jewish, middle-aged, jazzy, beautiful woman. (At first) I thought to myself, “What the hell can a white woman teach all these black students in this program? What can she possibly teach me? I’m sure she’s never been to the ’hood.” Every time I saw her, she was in a hurry.

One day, I was sitting in the cafeteria, and she walked up to me and started talking about the story I had written for admission. She told me I had an amazing background and needed to be helping other women by sharing my story. I couldn’t believe she cared enough to stop and tell me that. That was the day my life changed forever. She was that angel I had prayed for. I had asked God to send me someone who would accept me and help me get my story out to other women. I asked God for someone who wasn’t going to be intimidated by me, would love me unconditionally, and would help me unselfishly.

I took three of Dr. Kossak’s classes, so we got to know each other pretty well. I would visit her office and sit with her and we would talk socially as well as professionally about everything. She would ask questions about my life. One particular question she asked me quite often was, “What’s your bottom line? Why did you really change your life?” We met almost weekly in her office and discussed my story. We became really close.

Womenetics: How did it feel to have your story produced as a documentary for Georgia Public Broadcasting?
McSwain: The feeling was surreal, although it didn’t hit me until the night the documentary debuted. I received numerous calls and emails from viewers thanking me for being brave enough to break my silence. And then there were the ones that shared their stories of pain and abuse with me for the first time. This is when I realized, this is my true calling and at the end of the day I can help empower a woman or young girl to break their cycle of abuse by breaking their silence in order to heal.

Womenetics: I understand that you are working toward your Ph.D.; in what area? What is the subject of your dissertation?
McSwain: I am working toward my Ph.D. in social work, with a concentration in policy and administration. I am presently a first-year student. The subject of my dissertation is, “The study of the correlation between drug and substance abuse, sexual assault, and mental health disorders and domestic violence at domestic violence shelters among adult women with a history of childhood sexual abuse.”

I have a passion to empower women and young girls. I am doing extensive research on women who have been victims of childhood sexual abuse and the relationship between drugs and substance abuse, suicidal behavior, sexual assault, mental health disorders, and domestic violence.