Are Women More Ethical than Men?

Written by Alice Darnell Lattal Friday, December 10 2010

Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they becomes character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny. – Frank Outlaw

Do women think and behave differently than men when making ethical decisions? America’s roster of those indicted for corporate fraud lists mostly men, but men have historically been in the majority as top executives. That reality is changing. Although the number of women holding top executive positions is still woefully small, the number of women in professional and managerial roles has more than doubled (to approximately 21 million) during the past two decades. Are we really the exemplars of good decisions and good deeds that we believe we are when we occupy leadership positions?

The truth is that women aren’t moral or ethical simply because we were born female. Carol Gilligan, an internationally acclaimed psychologist, asserts that women do operate with a unique ethical perspective because of cultural conditioning. She states that men are more concerned with issues of rules and justice, while women focus more on caring relationships and are less likely to judge others. Such caring concern does not in itself lead to more ethical (wise) decisions.

The practice of ethics takes a lifetime of learning, and we are only as good at it as our history indicates. Those striving to be ethical start over every day, hoping to do it right, in a never-ending journey. As more women enter executive positions, we, too, must make decisions that demand ethical consideration at the same level of visibility as our male colleagues.

We need to surround ourselves with people who are committed to supporting ethical actions. They should be people who are alert to how easy it is to make a small mistake that can take on a life of its own and who are adept at identifying the unintended consequences of actions. If we are fortunate, we will have such people who tell us about their concerns directly and without apology.

Both genders share some common misconceptions about how to activate ethics in the workplace. Whether a decision is ethical or not is not defined by expressed beliefs or a values statement, but by behavior – what is actually said and done – and its impact on others. The science of behavior can help us to understand our individual history of choices and also to understand how “good people,” even ourselves, can do the wrong thing. Remember, it is doubtful that anyone who climbed the corporate ladder at Enron wanted to have “jailbird” on their résumé. One slips down an ethical slope one small step at a time. Understanding the laws of behavior can make it less likely that we will slip.

Here are a few practical steps:

Step 1: Learn about Behavior
Claims about the existence of women’s intuition may be based in part on our role in society to keenly observe the behavior of others. Of course, we all know we are not equally good at this just because we are women. But, as a group, we look at people. We listen to how they speak, how they approach us, and how they interact. This may give us a bit of an edge in understanding others, but the feeling that we are good at reading styles and personalities can lead us to make false assumptions about how we use that information – not always for the good. At times, women can and do label people unfairly. We can overestimate the character of a person and assume that character alone accounts for ethical actions. We can underestimate what is needed to sustain ethical actions throughout a corporation even when the right people are hired.

We begin to see behavior as a function of the consequences that have surrounded that behavior over many years. Again, ethics is not based on value statements, but on how those stated values show up in daily action. We should learn as much as we can about behavior and be a coach, not a perpetual critic.

To increase ethical behavior, we should not look to what people say they do, rather, look at what they do and at the impact of their behavior. We should lead by example and pay close attention to how our own actions increase or decrease certain behaviors in others. Honest self-assessment is the first step to an ethical work life. It is wise to regularly perform a self-evaluation and question our own motives and behavior.

Step 2: Make Open Dialogue Possible
As women, we tend to think that we are great listeners and conversationalists and that we talk more easily than men about “feeling” topics. But we, too, may be guilty of closing the door on dialogue when we’re in charge.

In the work venue, managers and executives should ensure that employees have an option other than gossip for voicing complaints and for making constructive suggestions. Managers must seek out the evaluative critique of employees and encourage an environment in which subjects with ethical implications can be discussed without fear of subtle or blatant retaliation. An open dialogue requires a reciprocal commitment between managers and employees to treat one another with respect. This type of environment will never occur if people perceive that such discussions will be used against them or that they are subsequently labeled as malcontents. The freedom to discuss issues without negative repercussions (or grudges) is a sign of an ethical workplace.

Step 3: Live the Example
We should attempt to act with honesty and integrity in all of our life events, but the work world presents new complexities. The workplace is not a democracy but a venue in which some are reported to and others report. This hierarchal structure can create situations in which those in charge forgo common courtesies.

If it is unacceptable for our employees to slam doors, yell, or make derisive remarks, then we should not do so ourselves. When we use negative techniques to get what we want, employees are afraid to tell the truth about a late product arrival or a customer complaint. Such aversive tactics are doubly unethical when we are in a position to control the consequences for another person.

Step 4: Be Accountable
During tough times, tough decisions must be made, but many executives exempt themselves from what the larger society judges to be ethical behavior. For example, some argue that Carly Fiorina, the deposed president and CEO of Hewlett-Packard Co., was unduly criticized because she was a woman in a high-profile position. The American public may have expected her to show more sensitivity to the ethical implications of her actions, to have exhibited more awareness in regard to personal gain over common good.

While she may have questioned the correctness of her compensation behind closed doors, she didn’t cut back on her $69 million salary, two corporate jets, and five bodyguards as HP terminated 10,000 employees and cut the salaries of thousands more. Her actions were legal, but were they ethical? She acted like many executives in similar positions. The burden was no greater for her because she was a woman. Even if she had cut her own salary, just as many people would probably have been laid off – but what a powerful message she would have sent.

Few of us will ever be offered such perks, but we should remember that we learn to justify inequities that are in our favor one step at a time. It’s easy to weasel out of self-assessment if no one else holds us accountable. A good idea is to tell a trusted co-worker about our personal improvement goals, and ask him or her to hold us accountable. And, if we ask our employees to make sacrifices, make those sacrifices ourselves. That may not be the rule, but it is the ethical choice.

Step 5: Reward Self and Others
Executives should reward the ethical behavior that leads to an end goal with the same enthusiasm that they reward the result. If we’re not in a leadership position, treat ourselves the way we want to be treated. We should not become self-righteous, but make decisions seeking a balance between the rights of others, justice, the common good, and self-interest. Then tell ourselves, “I made the right choice” and feel good about it.

These basic steps lead to great things, and they direct us away from dangerous territory. When we are diligent in the small honesties, we also are more likely to do the right thing when really put to the test. Are these steps any different for women than they are for men? Not really, but women may be more prone to take them. An Aspen Institute survey of students from a dozen of America’s leading business schools showed that 82 percent of women versus 72 percent of men agreed that it is very important for an organization to be managed “according to its values and a strong code of ethics.”

Of course, both sexes at every employment level can examine and improve their workplace ethics. However, if we are in a position to mold and enforce company values, we must mobilize ethical workplace codes and create systems that reward the right business practices.

Alice Darnell Lattal is president and CEO of Aubrey Daniels International (ADI),  www.aubreydaniels.com, a consulting firm dedicated to accelerating the business performance of companies worldwide using positive, practical approaches grounded in the science of behavior and engineered to ensure long-term sustainability. She serves on the board of directors of the Cambridge Center for Behavioral Studies and the board of advisors to the Cliff Oxford Center for Entrepreneurship of the Emory School of Business. She received a graduate degree from Johns Hopkins University and her doctorate in clinical psychology from West Virginia University. She is the co-author of four books related to workplace issues of ethics and stress, including A Good Day’s Work: Sustaining Ethical Behavior and Business Results.